Advent Conspiracy

Deep cries to deep

The Father to His Son & Daughter
The Lover to the Beloved :

And I long, to cover you with grace
And I long, to anoint your feet with praise
And I long, to see you face to face
Wont you come? Wont you come?

The Beloved responds
The bride is awakened and dawned... and she speaks :

And I long, to feel your warm embrace
And I long, to love and be amazed
And I long, to see you face to face
I will come.... I will come

on the high mountain we will see that this affliction is light
it is but a wind
passing away
on the valley we question whether eternity took a wrong turn into our city
is our pain ever going to end ?

"For instance, we know that when these bodies of ours are taken down like tents and folded away, they will be replaced by resurrection bodies in heaven—God-made, not handmade—and we'll never have to relocate our "tents" again. Sometimes we can hardly wait to move—and so we cry out in frustration. Compared to what's coming, living conditions around here seem like a stopover in an unfurnished shack, and we're tired of it! We've been given a glimpse of the real thing, our true home, our resurrection bodies! The Spirit of God whets our appetite by giving us a taste of what's ahead. He puts a little of heaven in our hearts so that we'll never settle for less."

-paul of tarsus, in his second letter to the corinthian church, THE MESSAGE .

"Get thee up into the high mountain."
Isaiah 40:9

Each believer should be thirsting for God, for the living God, and longing to climb the hill of the Lord, and see Him face to face. We ought not to rest content in the mists of the valley when the summit of Tabor awaits us. My soul thirsteth to drink deep of the cup which is reserved for those who reach the mountain's brow, and bathe their brows in heaven. How pure are the dews of the hills, how fresh is the mountain air, how rich the fare of the dwellers aloft, whose windows look into the New Jerusalem! Many saints are content to live like men in coal mines, who see not the sun; they eat dust like the serpent when they might taste the ambrosial meat of angels; they are content to wear the miner's garb when they might put on king's robes; tears mar their faces when they might anoint them with celestial oil. Satisfied I am that many a believer pines in a dungeon when he might walk on the palace roof, and view the goodly land and Lebanon. Rouse thee, O believer, from thy low condition! Cast away thy sloth, thy lethargy, thy coldness, or whatever interferes with thy chaste and pure love to Christ, thy soul's Husband. Make Him the source, the centre, and the circumference of all thy soul's range of delight. What enchants thee into such folly as to remain in a pit when thou mayst sit on a throne? Live not in the lowlands of bondage now that mountain liberty is conferred upon thee. Rest no longer satisfied with thy dwarfish attainments, but press forward to things more sublime and heavenly. Aspire to a higher, a nobler, a fuller life. Upward to heaven! Nearer to God!

"When wilt Thou come unto me, Lord?
Oh come, my Lord most dear!
Come near, come nearer, nearer still,
I'm blest when Thou art near."

-charles spurgeon

'Christianity started in Israel as a movement, then went to Rome and it became an empire, then went to Europe and became a government, then finally it came to America and became an enterprise.'

"I'm dizzy from the shopping mall
I searched for joy but I bought it all
It doesn't help the hunger pains
And a thirst I'd have to drown first to ever satiate

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
Something's missing
And I don't know what it is
No I don't know what it is
At all

...I can't be sure that this state of mind
Is not of my own design
I wish there was an over-the-counter test for loneliness
For loneliness like this...

....Friends - check
Money - check
Well-slept - check
Opposite sex - check
Guitar - check
Microphone - check
Messages waiting on me when I come home - check

How come everything I think I need
Always comes with batteries?
What do you think it means?..."

-john mayer, something's missing .

"they all cry out for Jesus" .

Night has found its way here
And all I can hear are memories shrill and clear
Like today man had his way
And stole and what I made
He saw that I was sincere

So use me up, then throw me away
Build your careers and friendships
Quote on Quote and frankly I’m ashamed
That I left my name on her lips
Cause when it ends they’ll swear it is

So I’ll fall asleep and try not to think twice
About all the things that forever
Will kick me down the steps
For being too nice
Cause everyone’s searching for treasure

And they’ll just dig, dig, dig
Until they cant get out
And die in dirty digging for treasure
But as for me I’m giving up and ill take my bow
And focus on my treasure forever
Yes, I know that my treasure is heaven

- bryce avary , rocket summer

to love and love again
to forgive 70 times seven
is a work of Love .
an action taken by one
who knows their treasure is in
a City made by Divine hands
"where moth and rust do not destroy,
and where thieves do not break in and steal".

As the Ruin Falls

All this is flashy rhetoric about loving you.
I never had a selfless thought since I was born.
I am mercenary and self-seeking through and through:
I want God, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn.

Peace, re-assurance, pleasure, are the goals I seek,
I cannot crawl one inch outside my proper skin:
I talk of love --a scholar's parrot may talk Greek--
But, self-imprisoned, always end where I begin.

Only that now you have taught me (but how late) my lack.
I see the chasm. And everything you are was making
My heart into a bridge by which I might get back
From exile, and grow man. And now the bridge is breaking.

For this I bless you as the ruin falls. The pains
You give me are more precious than all other gains.

C S Lewis

my simple song

all i want to see
is what your eyes delight in
all i want to hear
is the symphony that moves your heart
all i want to know
is the rhythm of your heart beat
cause you are everything to me
and i could spend my days
chasing the wind
and i will find in the end
that all that remains
is what i first started with
and that is your love
so dont let me move away from you
dont let me turn my eyes from you
i want to be overwhelmed
completely compelled
with the sight of your beautiful face.

let me know that you see me
help me believe you've never looked away
cause the knowledge of your love
is all that im needing
and the beauty of your grace
is what I am breathing
and to know that I am yours
will be more than enough today.

11/13/2008

"God treated Christ as if He were a sinner...
as though He had committed every sin that every person would ever commit ...
[ even though He wasn't a sinner ]
in order that He might treat believers [ even though we're sinful ]
as though we lived the perfect life of the Lord Jesus Christ. "

-Shai Linne .

this is our 100th post since we started this blog and so i thought i would take this line
TO THANK YOU
for reading our blogs .
and sticking with me
even though my writing
is at best:
GOOFY .
i hope and pray that our writing has in some way shape or form provoked you to love Christ and your neighbor more .

you have heard it said:

"We are the ones who are right, they are the ones who are wrong. We are the good guys, they are the bad guys. We are honest, they are crooks."

but i tell you this : " no man is good "

we're all sheep .

free falling

Here I am once again
Mercy is what I know best
They told me we are all prone to fall
So here I am once again
But this time when I fall
I'm going to free fall in love with You

Ecclesiastes 3:11
Yet God has made everything beautiful for
its own time. He has planted eternity in the human
heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope
of God’s work from beginning to end.

wheat & tare

i love how jesus leaves the tares with the wheat...
how he left the cursing psalms
& the patriarchs screw ups
& the sex in the song of songs.
& the story of when He beat the crap out of the moneychangers in the temple.
& paul and peter's argument behind closed doors.
& " jesus wept " .
& the wedding at cana, and how he kept the party going by providing the wine.
& the emo poetry in ecclesiastics.
...
because at the end He makes it all beautiful .
...

leave it all in. the beauty and the beast . the wheat and the tare .
humanity is beautiful.
be human.

"Life in community is no less than a necessity for us,
an inescapable 'must'...
all life created by God
exists in communal order
and works toward community."

-- Eberhard Arnold

being with the same people over and over again,
every day,
amplifies the need for forgiveness
again and again
and that i must learn to love
again and again.
i need to get over my insecurities.
asap.

give me eyes to see

Habakkuk 2:3
For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; Because it will surely come, It will not tarry.

Though it tarries, wait for it. Because it will surely come. It will not tarry.

Though it tarries, it will not tarry…..?

I prayed this morning and asked God to remove the veil of time from my eyes. Perhaps instead of me not seeing something that He sees, this time it’s that I am seeing something He doesn’t. I see time. I see waiting. I see questions and I see my own plans. But He doesn’t. He’s not subject to time. He’s not dependant of a clock or a calendar. And my own impatience demands explanations for his tarrying… when all along he’s saying “it will not tarry”. It’s not delayed. So I want His eyes. I want to see not just what He sees, but how He sees. I want to wake up and not worry about tomorrow. I want to “sleep” like Jesus did through the winds and the waves and know in my heart that it will be okay. I want to be okay with the fact that maybe God has a bigger plan for me than I have for myself and that maybe He wants to surprise me. And I want to let him take me there.

Half of our lives are spent trying to find something to do with the time we rushed through life trying to save. – [I don’t know who wrote this…. But its good.]

I flip my pillow to get to the cold side.
the same thing over and over again gets boring.
i read the book of Ruth today. don't know why she got her own book .
couldn't they have stuck her cute story in the middle of Judges or something ?
i now feel cool about her calling me her 'Boaz' . I thought it was a french curse word prior to my excursion into Ruth today during the old guy's lecture today in class.
i bought 5 dollar coffee tonight. actually two of them, one for a friend.
it just tastes better that way .
oh, and sorry.
for calling the church a whore.
i shouldn't have .

"the church is a whore and she is my mother"
-St. Augustine.

the church is indeed a whore but she is not my mother. She is me [ ? } and you
[ possibly ]
and yes, we are very sinful. we judge others when we ourselves are worthy of judgment. and this makes me angry.
but i won't run away. i won't give up on us .
i will pray for change.
and go back to the shack.

"were in repair" - John Mayer .

"loneliness is the first thing which God's eye named 'not good' " .
- Milton.

Naked.

"and the man and his wife were both naked and unashamed" - Genesis 2:25

Has anyone wondered why we wear clothes?
Adam and Eve didn't wear clothes before the Fall, right?
they didn't. (just in case you were searching)
They were naked, and unashamed.
I've never been naked, and unashamed.
why is that?
The Fall.
We lost relationship with Love.
and so were on this search for someone, something, to love us.
to tell us we are valuable.
when all along, Abba is asking:
"Where are you Adam?"
But i run, toiling and spinning, when will I learn from the Lilies?
that i can't add value to myself. That i'm at best in my sleep.
when i'm not going a hundred MPH looking for someone to say
"Good Job" .
buying 5 dollar coffee cups at Caribou when all along there's free coffee downstairs.
searching for leaves to cover my nakedness.

JOURNAL ENTRY : 10/5/08
I feel like I'm missing something. Jesus says that He loves me, a lot, actually unconditionally. That means that i can toil and spin, or I can sleep, and His love for me remains. But if that's true, then why do I long so much for someone to love me? Why do i toil and strut my stuff in the crowds searching for leaves to cover my nakedness? If I am really loved by Jesus, then that means that I don't have to strive to be loved. It means I can be myself, i can laugh at my own jokes, listen to folk. (?) It means that i can stop looking to her to fill that hole that we all have, the hole the size of an apple? If I trust that He loves me, since He does whether I do trust or not, then it releases me to run through the garden of this life without tripping over the approval of man every time i go to my closet or to the mall? Does this mean that I don't have to buy 5$ coffee cups because it makes me look cool?
It means a lot more than we think .
We are loved by Jesus, The Man
What does that mean to you?

"It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage; frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness; trinket gods; magic-show religion; paranoid loneliness; cutthroat competition; all-consuming-yet-never-satisfied wants; a brutal temper; an impotence to love or be loved; divided homes and divided lives; small-minded and lopsided pursuits; the vicious habit of depersonalizing everyone into a rival; uncontrolled and uncontrollable addictions; ugly parodies of community. I could go on."
- Galatians 5:19-21 ( The Message )

nothing else will satisfy.

Johns lonely voice crying out in the wilderness prepared the way for Emmanuel, God is with us.
A cry from self abandonment in our own wilderness has to usher in communion with Him... right?